As the clock moves from 10:30 to the later hours of the night I try to sleep to no avail. The heebe-jeebies of pain come stomping over my body as my ankles and knees writhe seeking comfort and sleep. What is this curse I fall under so many nights lately? Is this too a call to write? Almost asleep, I cannot enter the land of lullabies. Not fretting or anxious, just zapped here and there by pain. After 45 minutes I give up. It is almost as if when sleep approaches the pain takes on the character of the troll who lives under the bridge in the tale of the Three Billy Goats Gruff. Fearsome and ugly it threatens to eat me up. I am almost willing to let it!
My hand and wrist are tired from reading in bed and holding the book up. I move pillows around searching for that space where I can fall into a deep sleep, the oblivion that some babies and most teenagers are blessed with. Did Alice truly find a way through the looking glass? May I go, too, past consciousness to a place of restoration and refreshment, preferably without drugs.
Tonight it seems to be sit up until I yawn myself to sleep. Read and if necessary sleep in the guest room. For the moment the itching is quiet, replaced by jaw pain, thumbs ache, knees uncooperative, elbows, ankles, feet, shoulders, you get the idea? Throw in sore throat as the honeysuckle is blooming and mold count in the thousands, I am a mess. Did I mention finger joints enraged at osteoarthritis growth? Ha! They have a name! Herberden nodes. Well, goody. Now I can call a node by it's name. At least once they fuse they are no longer painful!
Sing along with Eric. He wasn't looking any too young in 2009 either.
Posted with Blogsy
The white Knight is walking backwards and Alice doesn't live here anymore..I wish I could make it all go away.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful, if painful, images. Sometimes great work comes out of great suffering.
ReplyDeleteDan