Not A Fan Week #2

We are doing the study "Not A Fan" in our church crosswalk group. This is part of my contribution for this evening.

In the journal section I wrote:

"I am willing to let You lead me regarding these uncomfortable feelings. I do not know how best to proceed. Help me rest in You and find my fulfillment in knowing You, Lord.

"Living surrendered to Jesus is like not having to take responsibility for all the outcomes.

There is a freedom that comes with being a slave."

Sometimes the Journal brings up uncomfortable things that the Lord would like to change. He showed me an area where I have the propensity to sin.

Propensity: tendency, leaning, inclination, bent, liability, bias, disposition, pension, susceptibility, predisposition, proclivity, proneness, aptness 

As I prayed about this area, He began to show me how He has repeatedly asked me to do things His way, shown me the need to change, and exhibited my behavior to me in the least destructive, yet clearest way. The question came up last week about what Jesus means about giving up everything and dying to self. I noticed that from my journal experience I can share that dying to self can be refusal to follow what we have always done, our habitual response. Loving God with all our heart, soul, mind, strength can be choosing His ways over our own, His thoughts as better than our own. From Ignatian Spirituality models we learn to say and to pray: "I want and I choose what better leads to God's deepening life in me."

These verses help me focus on this topic:

Mt 22:37. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 

Matthew 6:31-34 "So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

Jeremiah 6:16 This is what the Lord says:“Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls. But you said, ‘We will not walk in it.’ 

Isaiah 55:6-8 Seek the Lord while he may be found; call on him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts. Let them turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on them, and to our God, for he will freely pardon. “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. 

Micah 7:18-19 Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.

Always His way is scattered with instruction, directions, forgiveness, another chance to get it right. As I seek to love the Lord my God with all my might, I am not disappointed, but continually cared for, led, showered with compassion and pardon.

May your days be filled with his presence and grace.